M.A.M.A.S.
(Mothers Against Marxism And Socialism)

Last week, I posted a story ("Blueberry banana bread gone woke") about how I was asked to omit walnuts from a banana bread recipe I bake each week for the cast and crew of a musical my son is performing in. Everyone loves the walnuts except one young lady who has a life-threatening allergy. So, to allow her to also enjoy the banana bread, a member of the crew asked me if I could stop baking the loaf with walnuts.

My response: Why should everyone else have to go without walnuts because one person can't eat them? I have the greatest sympathy for people with food restrictions but I have no sympathy for people imposing their restrictions on others.

It's a Marxist-socialist approach to baking, in my opinion — trying to make everything equal for everybody.

Well, it seems many of the mothers who subscribe to my newsletter were in 100% agreement with me. The responses were so numerous I think these freedom-minded mothers need to band together and start an organization called:

M.A.M.A.S. (Mothers Against Marxism And Socialism)

Here are just a few of their comments:

"I totally agree with everything you said and wish more people would think through their ideals. It has also been my experience that whenever someone calls another selfish, it is he who is thinking in a selfish way. Unfortunately, a selfish person seldom sees the error of his own ways — he'd have to stop being selfish..."

I don't really mind if people want to be "selfish." In many ways, I have a deep respect for self-centred people (I often wish I could be more like them). It's only when they cross the line and expect others to sacrifice for their self-interest that I get annoyed.

Another mother commented:

"What do they think lists of ingredients are provided for? Are they now going to all the grocery stores to ask that they remove all foodstuffs that they cannot eat? It is the same mindset as punishing the entire classroom for one student's infraction."

I'm considering asking if all the cast could be required to wear blindfolds because my son is blind. It's totally unfair that they can all see each other, the stage and the audience while he cannot. They're a bunch of sight supremacists.

One last comment:

"Oh John! I so agree with you. We all need to 'include everyone or heaven forbid.' Just don't eat it if you have issues with an ingredient. This drives me nuts (pun intended)." 

In defence of the crew member who has driven you nuts, I do believe they made the request out of compassion for the one girl who couldn't eat the baked good because tree nuts will kill her quicker than an mRNA booster shot.

But compassion, like any virtue, needs to be tempered by discernment. Compassion for the one girl led to a request that showed no compassion for the other children. Compassion for one person can easily mutate into tyranny for many.

In the end, I feel I found a simple win-win solution: I simply scooped out a half-cup of the batter (before adding the walnuts) and placed it in a tea cup lined with parchment paper. I stirred in a tablespoon of roasted pumpkin seeds and baked a nut-free muffin. This way everybody else gets to enjoy the classic walnut-banana combo and the girl with the anaphylaxis karma can still enjoy a renegade banana-pumpkin seed muffin.

—John C.A. Manley

PS If you missed my "Blueberry banana bread gone woke" post (or would like the recipe) you can still read it at: https://blazingpinecone.com/news/2024/03/04/ 

John C. A. Manley is the author of Much Ado About Corona: A Dystopian Love Story, the forthcoming All The Humans Are Sleeping and other works of speculative fiction. Get free samples of his stories by becoming a Blazing Pine Cone email subscriber at: https://blazingpinecone.com/subscribe/